Children seem to have grown up in the blink of an eye. But as much as 7 years seems so far away, on the other hand I can remember it like yesterday.
7 years ago our son Michael was given his last and final dose of chemotherapy. After 3 years of drugs and treatments, fevers and hospital visits, he was done. DONE! And free! Free to GO. Free to just BE.
During his last visit, Michael's amazing Dr. told me that 7 years from that day and still cancer free, Michael would be considered "cured". I've never forgotten those words. And that day I marked my mental calendar for 7 years down the road. For 7 years I've been waiting. Waiting till now. To breath. To rejoice. To thank God.
I knew Michael would get there. Get HERE. There was no doubt. He is AMAZING. He is courageous. He is resilient. He is stubborn. He is loving and emotional. He is generous and smart. He is everything I could not EVER imagine losing.
In 7 years Michael has made his 1st Holy Communion, become a big brother (again),
If you know me, you know that I'm ever the optimist. There's always a bright side. Always a way to figure things out and make them better. I thank God for giving me my rose colored glasses because I know they are what got me through those years. I never let the thought of losing Michael overcome me. Or him. I always wanted him to feel normal and be treated as such.
Until now, I have never shared pictures of Michael while he was sick. I never wanted anyone to feel sorry for him. And I didn't want him to feel sorry for himself. He is a fighter and he would make it. There was NO other option.
Michael is 13 years old now. He remembers only bits and pieces of the 3 years that he was on chemotherapy. I think it's because we never dwelled on it. Those years are not what makes his life important. It's what he does with his life after going through those years that will be the most important thing of all.
It has taken me YEARS to be able to deal with the fact that I could have lost my son. I spent so much time in that hospital with Michael and what I had to see him endure is something no mother should ever have to allow. Going through that experience with Michael taught me so much. It taught me that there are so many things in life to be thankful for. So many things that are taken for granted. I learned not to hold grudges, to tell the people in my life how much I love them all the time. To show people with my actions that I think of them. To let things go. To forgive. To not worry about the small things. To enjoy every day. To hug. To talk things out. To remember important days. To pray. To give thanks. Because you just never know...
My dearest Michael,
You'll never know the impact you've had on my life. You'll never know how much you've inspired me. Because of you I know there is nothing we cannot make it through. No task too big, no burden too heavy. You never complained. You never felt sorry for yourself. You smiled, you waited, you rested, you watched. But you never complained. I would have given ANYTHING to take your place. But you taught me Michael. That the day to day things that make us grumpy are really nothing at all. Not compared to the true fights in life. Not compared to what we could face or what we could lose. I am so proud to have a son like you. I am so in awe of the life inside you. You can do anything. You can be anything. And you will. I know it. I am so SO blessed to be your mom! All my love, Mom
"A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles" ~ Christopher Reeve
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